Being a Black person in the UK and trying to find love can be a real challenge. The dating scene is already tough for many people, but for Black individuals, there are some unique difficulties that can make it even harder.
Firstly, there is a lack of representation in the media of Black people in loving, healthy relationships. Over time this has lead to a lack of positive role models and a feeling that finding love as a Black person is near enough impossible. There is also a stereotype of Black men as being aggressive and Black women as being angry, which can lead to mistrust and negativity within the black dating scene.
When dating, in general there can be the prevalence of microaggressions. This could be anything from someone assuming that you are less intelligent because of your race, to someone touching your hair without permission because they think it’s “exotic.” These small acts of prejudice can quickly make a person feel unwanted or unattractive, which can be devastating when you’re already trying to build a relationship with someone.
Additionally, the issue of colourism can also play a role in making it harder for Black people to find love. Colourism is the idea that people with lighter skin tones are more attractive, and this can lead to Black people feeling like they are not good enough because of their skin colour. This can also mean that Black people may only be attracted to partners who look a certain way, which can limit the pool of potential partners.
As a people a place to feel safe, wanted, where hope resides is a necessity. Melanin Matchmaker presents an opportunity to change things for the next generation. MM founder Dayo believes “If we date better, we marry better. If we marry better, we can family better. If we family better, we can community better.”
In conclusion, being a Black person in the UK and trying to find love can be a real challenge. However, there has never been a better time in history to change all of the above – always remember that love is possible, and that there are people out there who will appreciate you for who you are.